GTA Online Fun

Summary: Make the most out of bad situations in the game. Make them fun, and if you’re not having fun, especially against another player, just switch sessions.

It’s easy to get mad at others in GTA Online, but it’s more rewarding to turn the situation around. I was going against another player who shot me outside of LS Customs. If I can have a fair fight, I can have fun, even if I’m losing, because it’s a challenge. But after sending mercenaries after me and then setting a 9k bounty on me, I didn’t consider it a proper fight anymore, or fun, so I switched sessions. To me, involving mercenaries and other players means that the other person isn’t taking me seriously and doesn’t really care to duel; he just wants to shoot others randomly. Sometimes it takes a while to figure out what another player’s interest is.

Now, while I consider involving mercenaries and other players improper in a duel, surviving bounties is a different matter, because everyone is your enemy. So, where’s the best place to go when you’ve got a high bounty? A bank vault seems pretty secure.

Is it cheating to hide out in a bank vault? No, I don’t think so, because unlike apartments, other players can get into the vault, it’s just not as easy as walking through the door. While it would be nice if others could blow up the door to the bank’s basement, explosives are so common that there’s really nothing challenging in using them. I see using the XBox Game Store glitch to pass through the bars as an appropriate challenge, considering it’s a bank vault.

I went into the vault and hid behind the table in the deposit box room. Several players came to the bank to try to get me, and to their credit, a couple of them actually made it into the vault, but they died of sticky bomb and shotgun, respectively. To have a little more fun, and to make sure players couldn’t get to me in passive mode, I’d set 1k bounties on the ones that either made it into the vault or seemed like they would. And not that I needed to, but I also called the cops to my location. Why pay for mercenaries when cops are free and better?

After a while, all but one of my bounty hunters left out of frustration. The one who stayed, I noticed, was a level 5 player who had patiently been there almost the whole time, and to his credit managed to survive well enough against high-level players and the cops. So I texted him, “Your patience will be rewarded,” and walked out to the ground floor, where he was waiting on the other side of the barred door. I guess he didn’t know that he could just shoot me through the bars, as I was waiting for him to shoot me to get the bounty, but unfortunately I survived the time limit a moment later.

In the end, while I had meant to wait out the bounty and keep the money for myself, I probably spent around 9k on sticky bombs and placing bounties on others, so I didn’t get any money. But on the other hand, I turned what could’ve been another frustrating duel into something fun, and that level 5 player and I also became friends and went on a convenience store robbery spree.

Oh, your car can go just as fast? That’s nice.

Oh, your car can go just as fast? That’s nice.

Appa van!
By Joycall3
By GashibokA

Fatty!

Real ad.

Real ad.

The Ricer’s Guide to Useless Car Add-ons:1. As you know, the speed of a car is directly proportional to the output exhaust. Big and/or multiple mufflers amplify the sound of your crappy engine to give the impression that your car struggles just to make simple turns, and let’s everyone in the neighborhood know that you and your car are pieces of shit.2. Fake side air vents, and fake hood and side scoops improve performance by trapping air at key points around the car, keeping it cool so that the engine doesn’t overheat when you reach top speeds of around 70mph.3. Adding a spoiler to the back is a sure way to improve speed. Fun fact: 90% of a rally car’s speed actually comes from the aerodynamic spoiler; the engine and overall shape are just for style. Adding a spoiler to the hood or adding another spoiler on top of the rear spoiler will increase speed exponentially.4. Air fins on the bottom of the rear bumper will also help. Just look at how fast sharks are, and they only have one fin, which means that your car will be 8 times the speed of a shark [on land].5 Ground effects refers to the plastic, fiberclass, or paper mâché front, rear, and side “covers” added to the body of a car. These block air from passing underneath the car, redirecting it over the more aerodynamic top and sides, with no loss of speed. If you don’t hear a horrible scraping sound every time you drive over a speed bump, your car’s ground effects or suspension isn’t low enough.6. Large radial tires allow your car to move at greater distances and have a larger turning radius. The increased weight and inertia given by the tires mean faster and sharper turns. And the lack of air in the tires is just a no-brainer, because now you’ll never have a flat! This also lets you feel the contour of the road, with every pebble feeling like a speed bump, thus allowing you to feel more at one with the car.7. A carbon-fiber hood has the strength of steel without the weight. In your piece of shit ricermobile, every ounce of weight matters, because getting that extra 2mph out of the engine might be all that’s needed for you to win against your rival’s mother’s tricked-out Honda Civic. Carbon hoods only come in black, but everything goes with black, especially rust and spray-paint red.8. Lastly, while badges and decals don’t affect performance, you’ll still want to put them on your car for bragging rights and to show everyone how cool your car is. After all, you’re nothing if not a man of style. I’m sure many of the custom shops will be more than happy to give you decals of the branded parts you’ve put into your car. After all, they’ve ripped you off so much already on useless parts that you’re probably their best customer. And for added flair, be sure to add a European license plate to the front and/or a shoshinsha/wakaba mark, known to many of your friends as a JDM or Japanese Domestic Market sticker.Now, keep in mind, you could probably buy a real sports car, but the used sedan you bought at the scrapyard (great deal, btw, only $400 for a whole car!) is just so “you” and has more nostalgic value, whereas a sports car is a rip-off. After all, that would cost thousands of dollars, and you only have maybe a couple thousand, so which number is smaller? These added parts and modifications, individually, are still less than a real sports car, so no matter how many parts you buy, you’ll always save in the end! Plus you’ve already spent so much time and money on it, so you might as well just keep up the good work.Photo credit: www.ismellrice.comReal tips: http://www.popularmechanics.com/cars/how-to/products/performance-sapping-aftermarket-add-ons#slide-1

The Ricer’s Guide to Useless Car Add-ons:

1. As you know, the speed of a car is directly proportional to the output exhaust. Big and/or multiple mufflers amplify the sound of your crappy engine to give the impression that your car struggles just to make simple turns, and let’s everyone in the neighborhood know that you and your car are pieces of shit.

2. Fake side air vents, and fake hood and side scoops improve performance by trapping air at key points around the car, keeping it cool so that the engine doesn’t overheat when you reach top speeds of around 70mph.

3. Adding a spoiler to the back is a sure way to improve speed. Fun fact: 90% of a rally car’s speed actually comes from the aerodynamic spoiler; the engine and overall shape are just for style. Adding a spoiler to the hood or adding another spoiler on top of the rear spoiler will increase speed exponentially.

4. Air fins on the bottom of the rear bumper will also help. Just look at how fast sharks are, and they only have one fin, which means that your car will be 8 times the speed of a shark [on land].

5 Ground effects refers to the plastic, fiberclass, or paper mâché front, rear, and side “covers” added to the body of a car. These block air from passing underneath the car, redirecting it over the more aerodynamic top and sides, with no loss of speed. If you don’t hear a horrible scraping sound every time you drive over a speed bump, your car’s ground effects or suspension isn’t low enough.

6. Large radial tires allow your car to move at greater distances and have a larger turning radius. The increased weight and inertia given by the tires mean faster and sharper turns. And the lack of air in the tires is just a no-brainer, because now you’ll never have a flat! This also lets you feel the contour of the road, with every pebble feeling like a speed bump, thus allowing you to feel more at one with the car.

7. A carbon-fiber hood has the strength of steel without the weight. In your piece of shit ricermobile, every ounce of weight matters, because getting that extra 2mph out of the engine might be all that’s needed for you to win against your rival’s mother’s tricked-out Honda Civic. Carbon hoods only come in black, but everything goes with black, especially rust and spray-paint red.

8. Lastly, while badges and decals don’t affect performance, you’ll still want to put them on your car for bragging rights and to show everyone how cool your car is. After all, you’re nothing if not a man of style. I’m sure many of the custom shops will be more than happy to give you decals of the branded parts you’ve put into your car. After all, they’ve ripped you off so much already on useless parts that you’re probably their best customer. And for added flair, be sure to add a European license plate to the front and/or a shoshinsha/wakaba mark, known to many of your friends as a JDM or Japanese Domestic Market sticker.

Now, keep in mind, you could probably buy a real sports car, but the used sedan you bought at the scrapyard (great deal, btw, only $400 for a whole car!) is just so “you” and has more nostalgic value, whereas a sports car is a rip-off. After all, that would cost thousands of dollars, and you only have maybe a couple thousand, so which number is smaller? These added parts and modifications, individually, are still less than a real sports car, so no matter how many parts you buy, you’ll always save in the end! Plus you’ve already spent so much time and money on it, so you might as well just keep up the good work.

Photo credit: www.ismellrice.com

Real tips: http://www.popularmechanics.com/cars/how-to/products/performance-sapping-aftermarket-add-ons#slide-1

Found a Western Daemon motorcycle in GTA Online. It spawns in gang attacks against The Lost, but you can’t keep vehicles from gang attacks. I tried looking around The Lost hangout by Mirror Park, but no motorcycles at all there. The Lost trailer park also had no Daemons, although they had a lot of Hexers. Finally found one in front of Simeon’s car dealership, and now it’s mine.

shepherd0821:

LEGO is magic.